Day 6, Story 6: Elf Awareness

I get it. The holidays are here. You’re, like, super busy. Checking your email, buying presents, dressing up your dog, all that human stuff.

But once in a while, especially at this time of year, you need an elf’s perspective. 

As you can see, I’m an elf and as you can guess, I have some pretty unique insights. So, for Christmas’ sake, lend me your unpointy ear for just a few precious minutes.

It really boils down to one question.

Have you ever thought about how amazing Christmastime is?

For really real.

Just take a whiff of cinnamon, for example. 

IT’S TREE BARK–BARK FROM A TREE!–THAT SMELLS LIKE A HUG FEELS AND MAKES PIES AND COOKIES AND MORNING ROLLS TASTE LIKE HOLIDAY MAGIC AND SPICE AND EVERYTHING NICE.

What!?

Or consider your Christmas tree. 

IT’S A BEAUTIFUL EVERGREEN THAT GREW FOR FIFTEEN SPRINGS AND SUMMERS AND FALLS AND WINTERS THEN WOUND UP IN YOUR LIVING ROOM WEARING A SKIRT AND GLOWING LIGHTS AND MANY FANCIFUL ORNAMENTS AS TREE JEWELRY.

What!? 

Don’t even get me started on ornaments. 

THEY’RE LITTLE PIECES OF ART–ART!–MADE OF GLASS OR WOOL OR WOOD OR CERAMIC OR METAL, OR ANYTHING REALLY, THAT ARE COLLECTED OVER GENERATIONS AND BECOME STORIES THAT HANG EVERY YEAR ON THE MIRACULOUS TREE I JUST MENTIONED.

I mean, what!?

Relatedly, I’d be remiss if I didn’t put a spotlight on Christmas lights.

THEY’RE SPARKLING ORBS OF ILLUMINATION IN YOUR CHOICE OF SHAPES AND COLORS GIVING BRIGHTNESS JUST WHEN IT’S DARKEST AND PEOPLE PUT THEM ON THE OUTSIDE OF THEIR HOUSES LIKE A GIFT FOR NEIGHBORS’ EYEBALLS AND SPIRITS.

Whaaaaaat.

Oh and speaking of houses, you’d better not be taking gingerbread for granted. 

IT’S COOKIES MADE INTO GOSH DARN ENCHANTING EDIBLE COTTAGES–DESSERT ARCHITECTURE!–WITH ROYAL ICING AS CEMENT AND GUMDROPS AND PEPPERMINTS FOR DECOR AND AS WITH SNOWFLAKES NO TWO ARE THE SAME.

What!?

Also, let’s not overlook the concept of candy canes. 

THEY’RE CHARMING AND WHIMSICAL RED-AND-WHITE SPIRALS OF FRESH PEPPERMINTY SWEETNESS  A WITH BRILLIANTLY GENIUS HOOK DESIGN TO HANG ON TREES AND LOOP OVER THE EDGE OF STOCKINGS WHEN ALL KIDS USED TO GET WAS A SMALL ORANGE.

Gonna say it again. What!?

Lastly but not leastly, do you know how lucky you are to be with family at Christmastime?

THEY’RE HUMAN BEINGS WHO LOVE YOU NO MATTER WHAT–NO MATTER WHAT!–WORKING DAY AND NIGHT TO FIND THE PERFECT GIFTS AND BAKE DELICIOUS HOLIDAY TREATS AND THEIR BIGGEST JOY IS SEEING YOU BE HAPPY.

What. Wow.

Okay, by now, I’m sure you get the idea. Christmastime is pretty darn wonder-filled if you really stop and think about it. Take it from an elf.

Hmm? Oh, yes–please go ahead with your question. 

What about Santa? 

Yeah, he’s alright.

The end

(Note: Remaining holiday stories can be found here as they are released each day through 12/24, and ever after.)

2 comments

  1. Greg Hescock · December 21

    What!!!!!
    Me and that Elf are on the same wavelength.
    I’m in to all that Christmas stuff, I never really looked closely
    but my ears are slightly pointed at the top?
    WHAT?????

    • amberhj · December 21

      Dad, I always knew you were part elf. Despite the height!

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