Days 12 and 13: A big meltdown. A bigger milestone.

I am an incredibly emotional and sensitive person. After reflecting on this and how it relates to my new role, I said to my own mom, while she was here to offer desperately needed support for almost three weeks when Stella's tube was put in, "Motherhood will either break me, or make me incredibly strong."… Continue reading Days 12 and 13: A big meltdown. A bigger milestone.

Tube-free Stella: Days 9, 10 and 11

Stella is doing well. She is teething, however, which is throwing us all for a drool-covered loop. I can feel the bumps, the beginnings of teeth, in her gums. She cries with a bit more intensity and more often, gnaws on Sophie like she's made of candy, and while she is still her usual energetic… Continue reading Tube-free Stella: Days 9, 10 and 11

Tube-free Stella: Day 8

Stella finished four bottles today! I believe it was her best day, in terms of how much she ate, since the tube came out. I weighed her today and it appears she's lost three ounces since Friday, and weight loss isn't something a new mom likes to see, but I am truly not worried. Her… Continue reading Tube-free Stella: Day 8

Tube-free Stella: Days 6 and 7

Weaning continues to go well! It's hard to believe that the tube has been gone for one week. Though I must say, we've quickly gotten used to life without it--even our old nemesis, worry, is fading a bit each day. We look at pictures of her with the tube and marvel at what we've all… Continue reading Tube-free Stella: Days 6 and 7

Tube-free Stella: Days 4 and 5

Stella's appointment with her pediatrician went well yesterday. She weighed in at 14 pounds, 13 ounces. He said that she looks good and will see her in a week. He is optimistic and doesn't even think she will lose any weight. Still, I confess that I have been worried. Stella has eaten "only" about 5… Continue reading Tube-free Stella: Days 4 and 5

Tube-free Stella: Day 3

Stella is aptly named. Today we received an effusive outpouring of support. From a stranger with whom we'd never spoken but who'd seen Stella with the tube and couldn't stop gushing about how happy she was to see her without it. From two shop clerks whose eyes brightened at the sight of her tube-free face.… Continue reading Tube-free Stella: Day 3

Tube-free Stella: Day 2

Can't sleep so I thought I'd write a quick update. Weaning seems to be going well. Stella is happy and eating pretty often. As is expected over the course of her complete transition from the tube to the bottle, her volume will increase over time. I am struggling to let go of my obsession with counting every milliliter… Continue reading Tube-free Stella: Day 2

Tube-free Stella: Day 1

Stella is off and running. I am so proud of her. In short, she is responding well and our confidence is growing. She can do this. It is expected that she will lose a little bit of weight. I am on strict instructions to NOT WORRY about how much she eats or when. To NOT PANIC if she… Continue reading Tube-free Stella: Day 1

The tube is out. I repeat: The tube is OUT.

And we are leaving it out. This weekend, I sent Stella's pediatrician and occupational therapist an email outlining my concerns about the tube and research to back up those concerns. Today, they agreed to a tube-free "trial." Her doctor said two to three weeks without the tube would be "low risk" given how healthy she… Continue reading The tube is out. I repeat: The tube is OUT.

The stubborn determination of hope

Good news. Stella is back to taking in about half of her daily calories from the bottle, just as she did before the recent regression. However. My feeling is that the tube is preventing her from recovering completely. I believe that it exacerbates her reflux and makes swallowing more difficult. I found and paid for two medical… Continue reading The stubborn determination of hope